Saturday, May 17, 2008

You might be an MT if

You might be a medical transcriptionist if/when:

The last book you read on vacation was a diagnostic guide to tendon injuries.

Someone yells duck and you start typing d-U-c-t in midair.

You start correcting people's grammar mistakes in a chat room dedicated to discussing movies and TV shows.

You know your gluteus maximus from your olecranon process.

Your favorite 3 words are "end of dictation."

You refer to making your holiday turkey as prepping and draping in the usual fashion.

You guess the outcome of CSI in the first 5 minutes of the show after hearing the (not-so-mysterious) mysterious cause of death.

You can't go into a doctor's office without asking the receptionist "Who does your medical transcription?" or commenting to your own doctor that you think he's a bad dictator and you feel sorry for the MT working for him.

Your doctor tells you that you have a problem with your back but doesn't want to confuse you with the details and you ask him -- "Were sagittal and coronal T1-weighted images performed and T2- and proton density-weighted images also obtained?"

You think percussion is something that belongs more in a medical report than in a rock band.

You say to your honey, "skip the flowers and chocolate for my birthday and get me the latest version of Stedman's Medical and Pharma spellchecker."

You offer your landscaper 7 cents per line of grass for mowing your lawn.

You press the left pedal in your car and you're surprised when the car doesn't go into reverse.

Your neighbor comes to you to make a diagnosis based on a series of symptoms and advise them on whether to have surgery or not. (you refuse of course LOL)

Your favorite quote is "Acronyms bad, verbose originators good."

You can fix stuck keys on your computer keyboard by turning it upside down and banging out the crumbs.

You have a Mr. Coffee within arm's reach of your desk.

The first place your husband and children look for you is at your desk rather than in the kitchen.

Your husband and children wave their hand between your face and the computer screen to get your attention.

You can fold laundry while sitting at your desk and listening to the latest dictator who speaks 5 words in 60 seconds... and still changes his mind 4 times on exactly how to put it.

You step on people's feet to get them to repeat what they just said.

You have a bladder capacity of more than a quart.

You have a bookshelf by your desk in which no two books are the same color.

Your dream is to someday have every book Stedman's makes.

Your wrist rest has food spots on it.

No one who doesn't know how to touch type can use your computer keyboard because at least half the keys have the letters worn off.

Your friends have to learn your macro names in order to read your emails to them.

Your husband and children have to learn your macro names in order to read the notes you write them.

You are the only one in your family who can understand the clerks at the 7-11.

You find watching only one TV screen at a time boring.

You correct the pharmacist's spelling.

It aggravates you that the keys on the telephone keypad are in a different order than the keys on the 10-key pad on your computer keyboard.

You have a mini refrigerator sitting next to your computer tower.

More than half the icons on your desktop have to do with drugs or dictionaries.

There are more coffee cups in your office than there are in the kitchen.

You have your Mr. Coffee plugged in to your UPS (battery backup).

Your friends want you to go to their doctor appointments with them so you can act as an interpreter.

You go to the doctor with your spouse who tells the doctor, "She's a medical transcriptionist so I'll let her tell you what's wrong with me." To this, the doctor replies, "OK...would you prefer to tell me or do you want to type it?"

You flip back and forth between work and newsgroups.

You watch television commercials for prescription drugs very closely to see what the generic form is and how both are spelled.

You get an invitation to something that specifies "work attire" and you wonder if that means fluffy slippers, flip flops - or if it would be okay to show up barefoot.

You go to start the car to go to the grocery store and find the battery is dead. You don't know how long it's been dead.


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